Monday, 19 December 2011

that time again....depression!!!

every now and then it pops up.. and you dont know why... and how to cope with it... you take it out on the ones closet to you... and at the time it seems like the world is against you and what is the point in everything... i remember why back when i was first diagnosed with type 1... but more so the pain or the neuropathy i thought i was being punished for something.. that i was such a bad person that i was to be tortured for this.... i guess i have alwayas had a temper... my sister can vouch for that as as kids i used to hit her all the time... there has always been 2 sides to me i think... the laid back... loves to be around people.. centre of attention... funny witty charming.. modest!!... but then there is the moody short tempered... jealous... lonesome one... i am in to minds as to post this or not as there are some folks that have only seen the "good" lee lol... but i the reason i started this was to help me understand what is going on... and as a way of looking back in a few months/years and seeing reminding me of how bad it was... i know it will get better.... it has too.... like many other people i know i am good at giving advice to others but not following my own... and as a dear friend said to me recently (as i had told that person many times before) ONLY YOU CAN SORT THIS OUT... which is that same as in most things... i can talk about sugar control in the same breath.. pain control .... i guess we all need to take a long hard look at ourselves every so often... yep my life has changed dramaticly over the past few years... but it is up to me to make my future work for me and not think it will change itself ... so my JERRY SPRINGER sum up lol... dont ignore it... dont try and deal with it yourself... you are not alone... talk.. listen... act... do.... take care of yourself and each other...;)... me